Monday, September 15, 2008


TO: Vast Right Wing Conspiracy
FROM: You Know Who
SUBJECT: Everything is going according to plan

My Dear Minions,
Bwahhh, hah hah hah, oh bwah hah hah heh. To quote the late, great, Hannibal Smith: I love it when a plan comes together. Oh you doubted me. It is all right to admit it, you doubted. Well, what do you think of me now? Bwah hah hah. Heh heh heh.

Everyone was skeptical when I secretly orchestrated the super-delegate surge to Obama, giving him the nomination despite the fact that more Democrat primary voters voted for Hillary (that is right, Obama was selected, not elected. Selected by me! To Lose!).

You said, “Oh, Karl, Obama will be hard to beat, Hillary will be easy”. But I knew better. I had my secret weapon to make Barack crack. I like that: crack Barack. Crack Barack. Barack has cracked. Heh heh heh heh.

I first spotted Sarah on the Wasilla City Council and have been orchestrating her rise ever since, honing her into the perfect weapon to induce insanity in the Democrats. Bwah! And to help them along, I planted the absurd stories – about the Sarah faking her pregnancy (borrowed that from Desperate Housewives! Did they notice? Hah!). I have planted so many Sarah fables that not even the MSM will believe it when the real skeleton in her closet is revealed!

Heh heh heh heh. The Obama camp thinks they can change their fate, but even if you put hair plugs on a pig, it is still a pig!

Defend Sarah, defend me, defend McCain (yes, you must), attack all Obama, ignore Biden etc etc. Do not get cocky … aw, what the hell, go ahead and get cocky!


P.S. I hope you all took my advice and shorted oil at 140.


Anonymous Anonymous said...

Disorganized Community Seeks Return of Obama

5:01 PM  
Anonymous goreeffect said...

Brilliant Sisyphus!

12:14 PM  

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