Wednesday, March 18, 2009

Top 11 Predicted Gaffes Vice President Joe Biden Will Make In St. Cloud Tomorrow

11. He will talk about how Governor Floyd B. Olson went on television after the stock market crash in 1929 to reassure Minnesota

10. In honor of SCSU, he will lead a chant of "Let's Go Gophers"

9. He will refer to Minneapolis and St. Paul as the "Twin Cities" rather than "The Cities" leaving everyone in Stearns County confused

8. He will pledge to follow in the footsteps of the Vice Presidents from Minnesota and one day be elected President

7. He will refer to King Banaian as a highly regarded Turkish-American economist

6. He'll mention this is only the second time he's been to Canada.

5. His gift of special edition "Fargo" DVD won't go over well with St. Cloud mayor

4. While he thinks mic is off will say to staff members: "My God, how do people live in this Shiite-hole! This place is worse than Rochester."

3. He'll commend the residents commitment to the environment shown by canonizing a cloud

2. He will praise Saint Cloud for having driven the snakes out of Ireland

1. He will ask to see the case where SCSU keeps all their NCAA Division 1 hockey championship trophies

3 Comments:

Blogger DiscordianStooge said...

7. He will refer to King Banaian as a highly regarded Turkish-American economist

Is this funny because he's not highly regarded?

2:47 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I think we're going for something more in the "he's Armenian not Turkish" area.

4:05 PM  
Blogger DiscordianStooge said...

I see.

1:57 PM  

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