It’s Hard Out Here For A Climate Pimp

Al Gore has a Grammy award for best rap record just lying there for the taking. To make it even easier, I have adapted Three-6 Mafia’s Academy Award winning classic, “It’s Hard Out Here For A Pimp” just for him.

WARNING: Explicit lyrics – this is climate rap, after all.

You know it’s hard out here for a climate pimp (you ain’t knowin)
When he tryin to get his money for the mansion (you ain’t knowin)
For the private jets and fuel money spent (you ain’t knowin)
Because a whole lot of scientists talkin my shit (you ain’t knowin)
Because a whole lot of scientists talkin my shit (you ain’t knowin)

In my eyes I done seen some crazy thangs in the climate
Gotta couple weather hos workin on the changes for me
But I gotta keep my game tight like Carter on nobel night
Like takin from a climate ho don’t know no better, I know that ain’t right
Done seen people fly, done seen people SUV
Done seen people live with no Prius for wheels
It’s fucked up planet I live, but that’s just how it is
It might be cool to you, but it’s been warmin up for years
It’s blood sweat and carbon when it comes down to this shit
I’m tryin to get rich on this carbon offsets bitch
I’m tryin to have thangs but it’s hard fo’ a climate pimp
But I’m prayin and I’m hopin my power bill don’t leak, yeah

Man it seems like I’m duckin dodging Lomborg everyday
Judgaz hatin on me cause I got, climate lies on the tray
Butt I gotta stay paid, LA gotta stay above water
When Hollywood goes drown, award winz gets harder
Washington D.C. where I’m from, I’m 1600 bound
Where senataz all the time end up lost and never found
Man these fools think we prove thangs, climate change cred
They come hopin every night, they don't end up bein dead
Wait I got a snow blizzard, and a scorchin drought too
You play the right press and they both support you
That's the way the game goes, gotta keep it strictly pimpin

Gotta have my hustle tight, makin change off climate change, yeah