Top 11 Reasons That Sisyphus Is Heartbroken

11. Global warming is not proceeding rapidly enough to allow him to wear shorts and Hawaiian shirts all winter

10. Dan Rather's retirement

9. Team USA knocked out of World Cup

8. Mitch didn’t invite him to guest blog at Shot In the Dark during his vacation

7. Learned that Tera Patrick is married to Evan Seinfeld

6. The OC is in reruns

5. The Nihilist killed his post exposing the forged two-for-one dining card scam the Nihilist runs

4. Has prior commitment on day of gay pride parade and won't get chance to catch RT Rybak leaping off float

3. Gets down every time he hears Hendrix song, "The Wind Cries Mary"

2. Learned that the rumors of The Nihilist's unfortunate demise in a freak golfing accident were unfounded

1. M-Kat taking week off from blogging