Thursday, June 01, 2006

Al Gore’s Top 11 Duties As A Senior Advisor To Google

11. Make a documentary for Google employees proving that the pilfering of office supplies will hasten the heat death of the universe

10. Hang around Google executive headquarters, so the president of Google looks smarter

9. Give tips on customizing the Google private jet

8. Enlist Tipper's help in determining which Google searches need to be censored

7. Consult with Google engineers who may have questions about the way the internet is designed

6. Advise the legal department on controlling legal authorities

5. Serve as a recruiting tool for the Google Employees Weight Watcher's group

4. Negotiate with former campaign contributors the conditions under which Google can do business in China

3. Recommend ways to reduce the greenhouse gasses emitted by the search engine

2. Give lectures to Google employees on Sartre and Camus in French

1. Create a special Google homepage for Memorial Day


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