Top 11 People Really Responsible For The 35W Bridge Collapse

11. Omar Sharif (he writes a syndicated daily bridge column and never once mentioned funding the 35W bridge)

10. Big Oil

9. Henry Ford

8. Hedge funds

7. Adam Smith

6. Leo Strauss

5. The Mossad

4. The Federalist Society

3. Wellstone, for dying before he had a chance to secure proper funding for our bridges

2. The people who killed Wellstone before he had a chance to secure proper funding for our bridges

1. God, for, like, not stopping it and stuff