Monday, March 27, 2006

Top 11 Other Hotel Demands Made By Dick Cheney

The Smoking Gun has obtained a written list of requests made by Dick Cheney of the hotels that he stays at. NIGP has managed to uncover the top 11 Cheney hotel demands that the White House deemed too controversial to put in writing (although most of them seem perfectly reasonable to us):

11. A supply of death row inmates for target practice

10. An omelet made of spotted owl eggs

9. Genetic clone on ice in case he needs any spare organs

8. Radio tuned to the Hugh Hewitt show, especially if the "Smart Guys" are on

7. Unicorn blood for rituals

6. An already inflated Maureen Dowd doll

5. The bathtub must be filled with motor oil (Lucas Motor Oil, Plus Racing Oil, 20W50)

4. Defibulators strategically posted within 12 feet of all locations

3. Lithograph on the wall of Gepetto pulling Pinnochio's strings

2. A stereo with volume that goes to "11" and a CD of "It's Hard Out Here for a Pimp"

1. Stock ticker to track Halliburton profits (and laugh)


Blogger Eightgun said...

I think you meant "defibrillator", although "defibulator" is also very interesting. Look up "infibulation" on Google and you'll see why.

11:32 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

12) Ethanol in my glass, not in my gas!

2:13 PM  

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