Casting Call

The Nihilist in Golf Pants is on to a winner with his right-wing blogger friendly movie “The MOB Rules”. Unfortunately, he is less skilled as a casting director. So, we sent him back to the word processor to write a bigger part for King Banaian while we work out the deals to land the following cast:
NIGP – Ray Romano
Sisyphus – Mel Gibson
Chad The Elder – Jon Stewart
St. Paul – Frank Caliendo
JB Doubtless – Ben Affleck
Sober Atomizer – Keanu Reeves
Intoxicated Atomizer – Andy Dick
James Lileks – Bob Balaban
King Banaian – Tom Selleck
Mitch Berg – Randy Quaid
Big Trunk – V-Toed Bill
Hindrocket – Learned Foot
Deacon – Steve Buscemi
Warrior Monk – Andy Garcia
Eloise – Mary Steenburgen
Cap’n Ed – Tommy Lee Jones

Jo – Elisabeth Shue
Mark W. – Nicholas Cage
And then they will make the sequel: “Leaving Deadwood”

Margaret Martin – Penelope Cruz
David Strom – Ricky Gervais
Terry Keegan – Sean Connery
Virginia Keegan – Cybill Shepherd
Marty Neumann – Alex Trebek
Nathan Anderson – Joey Fatone
PMB – John Malkovich
Learned Foot – Brett Favre
V-Toed Bill – Fabio
Noodles – Phillip Seymour Hoffman
Mac Penguin – Jennifer Coolidge
First Ringer – Josh Hartnett
JD – Garrison Keillor
Policy Guy – Gary Cole (Bill Lumdbergh from Office Space)
Mark Yost – Tom Arnold
Mrs. Yost – Frances McDormand
Gary DvK – Jon Lauck
DC – Holly Hunter
Bogus Doug – the guy who played Michael Bolton in Office Space
Jim Boyd – Peter Boyle
Nick Coleman – Larry David
Laura Billings – Eve Plumb
Laura H. – Jennifer Aniston
Hugh Hewitt – Peter Billingsley
Ghost of Elvis – NIGP
Cathy in Wright – Teri Hatcher
Anoka Flash – Al Franken
Chief – Matt Damon
Swiftee – Dennis Hopper
Cap’n Fishsticks – Bill Murray
Patrick Campion – Wayne Knight
St. Paul Groupie #1 – Jessica Simspon
St. Paul Groupie # 2 – Pamela Anderson Lee
St. Paul Groupie # 3 – Lisa Loeb
St. Paul Groupie # 4 – Angelina Jolie
St. Paul Groupie # 5 – Tom Cruise
St. Paul Groupie # 6 – Kirstie Alley
St. Paul Groupie # 7 – Kirsten Dunst
St. Paul Groupie # 8 – Reese Witherspoon
St. Paul Groupie # 9 – Anna Nicole Smith
St. Paul Groupie # 10 – Jennifer Lopez