Top 11 Ways To Get Wisconsin Democrat Senators To Return For A Vote

11. By executive order, rescind the shareholder rights of any Packer stockholder in Illinois

10. Agree to hold all future votes via card check

9. Cut off the pay-per-view adult movies at the Rockford, IL Best Western

8. Allow one day in-person registration for doe permits at the capitol tomorrow

7. Declare tomorrow "Packer's Day" in Madison and announce that Aaron Rodgers will be appearing at the capitol

6. Convince Illinois legislature to pass a law subjecting visitors from Wisconsin to their new income tax rates

5. Hire "Dog" the bounty hunter

4. Free showing of "Norma Rae" in the Senate chambers

3. Allow them to drive back by raising the legal blood alcohol limit to .25

2. Free deep-fried cheese in the Senate cafeteria

1. Impersonate George Soros' voice and order them to return