Tuesday, January 04, 2011

Top 11 Real Reasons the Patriot Cancelled the NARN First Team

11. Needed to maximize revenue during the two hours of the day when the station's signal actually reaches anybody.

10. Keith Olbermann threatened to name the Patriot The Worst Radio Station in the World if the NARN First Team named him Loon of the Week one more time.

9. Hugh Hewitt used the hosts’ attendance record to justify his vacation schedule

8. Big Crop Art willing to do almost anything to keep conservatives out

7. Management accidentally tuned in on a recent Saturday and realized something must have gone horribly wrong with the memo they sent six years ago canceling the program after a one week failed experiment.

6. Mitch and Ed constantly complaining about the empty beer bottles left in the studio

5. Let's just say that when Josh Arnold wants you to play ball, you play ball.

4. Lost a costly lawsuit to Victor for infringing on his copyrighted phrase "We need to have fistfights in the halls of Congress!"

3. Had to take a hard line against Brian's demands for gas money

2. Figured it was redundant to have two shows targeting the same "angry and confused by the news" demographic

1. It took a while and he had to buy an investment firm to do it, but Dan Rather finally got his revenge

3 Comments:

Anonymous Stoned Ron said...

Station management has a personal interest in landing penile enhancement show to fill the 11am-noon slot.

9:41 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I thought it was Vincent who did the fistfighting

11:24 PM  
Anonymous golf course rating said...

Hey, it is Vincent who had first sighted it, right? I know he was.

11:53 PM  

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