Friday, May 15, 2009

Top 11 Other Excuses Nancy Pelosi Has for Approving Water Boarding in 2002

11) She was under the impression the CIA was talking about taking the prisoners surfing

10) The CIA kidnapped her the night before and forced her to watch a "24" marathon

9) She thought these were techniques being used ON the Bush Administration, not BY the Bush Administration

8) Had her eyes on an earmark for Jack Murtha's nephew who works for a water board manufacturing company

7) Afraid she would lose her free military jet privileges if she didn't approve

6) Karl Rove hypnotized her

5) Back in 2002 the Democrats hadn't yet decided to make opposing torture a political issue

4) Hoping to get an all expenses paid fact-finding junket to Cuba out of the deal

3) Listening to Toby Keith music on her iPod during the briefing, caught up in blood-lusting, jingoistic fervor

2) She thought she was approving a new form of partial birth abortion

1) She thought water boarding sounded more Green than applying electricity to gonads


Blogger Nihilist in Golf Pants said...

Thought it was a new way that her masters packed their tuna

9:42 PM  
Blogger Nihilist in Golf Pants said...

This comment has been removed by the author.

9:42 PM  
Blogger John F Not Kerry said...

Thought "Water Board" referred to a municipal authority that would put citizens even more under the thumb of left-wing environmentalists.

7:35 AM  
Anonymous nihl said...

Who needs excuses, Nancy keeps smiling as if she did the boarding personally. If those staples holding her skin on her face pop out, they will likely kill someone

12:44 AM  
Blogger Ben said...

in 2002, waterboarding actually made sense. In 2008 it doesn't because we haven't had an attack since 2001 waterboarding is dumb

4:11 PM  

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