Top 11 Reasons OJ Allegedly Robbed Sports Collectors

11. Didn't think anyone would suspect that a football player would do something illegal

10. Trying to fill void in Hillary's fundraising efforts left by arrest of Norman Hsu

9. After Katrina, realized that it was only way he could get ahead in George Bush's Amerika

8. Getting a head start on claiming his share of reparations for slavery

7. His dog-fighting business no longer profitable

6. If he can get away with a double murder, he can certainly get away with a simple robbery

5. Needs money to continue his quest to find the real killers

4. Needs money to continue his quest to prove that the moon landings were fake

3. Didn't realize they have security cameras in Vegas hotel/casinos

2. Was reasonably certain that laws didn't apply to him

1. Has already written his next book: "If I Robbed That Sports Memorabilia Guy"