Saturday, March 18, 2006

Why He Want To Be So Dumb?

Riddle Me This:

Q: What do you get when you combine the intellect of Jessica Simpson with the looks and talent of Nick Lachey?

A: Learned Foot

Backstory: On Thursday, Learned Foot brought his rag-tag band up north to Keegan's pub to try his hand at the 8 pm Keegan's pub quiz, the subject of which this week was Irish trivia in honor of St. Patrick's day on Friday. In preparation, they invoked a plan titled number eight.

I assumed the eight signified the number of questions (out of a possible 25) that the KAR bunch planned to correctly answer. I was wrong. Here are the top 11 facts related to Thursday's 8 pm pub quiz:

11. Learned Foot got 4 right out of 25

10. The subject was Irish trivia.

9. Learned Foot is of Irish descent

8. The Fraters team, featuring yours truly, consisted of three people of German descent, with only one member of Irish descent.

7. The Fraters team finished in the money (alone in second place) with 13 correct, winning four fine Irish beers and a Sam Adams necktie.

6. Four of the questions were multiple choice with four possible answers, meaning Foot likely got 1 right just from guessing.

5. Therefore Foot was 3 for 21, or 14.3% correct on non-multiple choice questions

4. Every member of the weak hitting Minnesota Twins should hit better than .143 in 2006 if they have more than 20 at-bats

3. Foot cheated on the quiz, illegally bringing at least eight pages of Irish trivia that he brazenly set on the table during the quiz. Terry Keegan decided not to punish him as his performance did not impact the winners.

2. I conducted a partial review of Foot's cheat sheet. At least two of the answers were included. Therefore, Foot scored 1 of 19 5.3% on non-multiple choice questions that he didn't already for which he didn't have the answers.

1. Vince Young was routinely savaged as an idiot for scoring a 6 on the NFL's Wunderlich test


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