Monday, March 06, 2006

Top 11 Hardest Things About Being A Pimp

Last night during the Oscar telecast, George Clooney taught us that while Hollywood may be out of touch, it is out of touch in a good way. Hollywood, he says, often sheds light on a problem before the rest of the nation is prepared to deal with an issue. His point was proved later in the broadcast when the Original Song Oscar went to “It’s Hard Out Here for a Pimp”.

Most of America has no idea how hard pimps have it, but Hollywood (and this blog) are way ahead of the curve. Here is our attempt to enlighten America by exposing the top 11 hardest things about being a pimp:

11. Workman's comp costs are out of control

10. Being called "my brotha" by Pat O'Brien

9. Rising gold prices make dental plan very expensive

8. Stressed out by criticism from the playa hatas

7. Harder to roll in the Caddy with rising gas prices

6. When your bitches talk back

5. The immorality of George Bush's America

4. When some other pimp tries to steal your bitches

3. Finding enough ho’s to meet demand during Minnesota Vikings bye weeks

2. Animal rights activists protesting the feathers in your pimp hat

1. Maintaining street cred when you've just been honored by "The Academy"


Blogger pinkmonkeybird said...

#12) Always havin' to fit that "schizzle" word into yo raps. Wut do dat mean, anyway?

11:40 AM  

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