Sunday, September 04, 2005

Top 11 Ways George W. Bush Could Have Prevented Hurricane Katrina

11. He could have asked Ted Kennedy and Michael Moore to go to the gulf in hopes that their combined gravitational field would deflect the hurricane away from New Orleans.
10. He could have sacrificed one of his daughters to the hurricane gods.
9. He could have forced Halliburton to stop suppressing their anti-hurricane machine.
8. Since a butterfly flapping its wings in the Amazon can lead to a hurricane, Bush could have urged the eradication of all butterflies in the Amazon on the off chance it would have prevented Katrina.
7. He could have ratified Kyoto and destroyed our economy on the off chance it would have prevented Katrina.
6. He could have summoned Superman to blow the storm back into the Gulf of Mexico.
5. If Karl Rove really wanted to prevent the hurricane, I’m sure he could have found a way.
4. He could have consulted Senate Democrats on their ideas for hurricane prevention.
3. If our troops weren’t in Iraq, they could have shot the hurricane, or something.
2. He could have banned the use of “Hurricane” as a sports team nickname.
1. He could have asked the UN for a resolution preventing Katrina from making landfall.

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