Friday, April 03, 2009

Top 11 Reasons Winteryminx Hasn't Posted Lately At NIGP

11. She's been busy with extra work in the NIGP steno pool

10. Too busy stuffing the ballot box for NiGP in the City Pages "Best of" contest for Best Local Web Site and Best Villain

9a. Ever since Sisyphus started wearing shorts again, she has had trouble concentrating

9b. Ever since Sisyphus started wearing shorts again, she considers the NIGP corporate offices to be a hostile work environment

8. JB keeps making her iron his shirts during her free posting time

7. "Days of Our Lives" has been really engrossing lately

6. Gave up writing withering satire for Lent

5. In hindsight, it turns out that having JB mentor her probably wasn't such a good idea

4. She went off and popped out a couple more kids

3. Still undergoing medical procedures for the debut of her next moniker "Hairy Backed Swamp Developer"

2. She has a headache, maybe tomorrow

1. It's...uh, you know...a "woman's thing"


Blogger wintryminx said...

The animals are turning on each other. An eleven-step counterpoint, allowing for number 9 parts "a" and "b":

11. Zeitgeist phenom Mad Men led me to believe steno-pool work involved drinking, smoking and swanning around in tight skirts. I didn't know I was actually expected to do stuff.

10. This is an obvious attempt to get me to make a joke about stuffing a box.

9a. This is true. I didn't know white came in that shade.

9b. Also true. Mostly because of the 3-inch rise.


7. How silly. Days of Our Lives is always engrossing.

6. I gave up sweets. It's making me crabby.

5. This sentence is a mess.

4. I've actually been lobbying Madonna to take a few of the ones I have.

3. It's not so much a medical procedure as a topical cream.

2. Um, maybe if you brushed your teeth a little more thoroughly, I'd feel more like writing.

1. What, you mean funny?

8. Ha ha!

9:48 AM  
Anonymous MFB said...

Nice counter WM. I especially like #9a and #2. The original #5 has been made less messy.

#1 was based on high school gym class experience. Whenever a girl didn't feel like participating, she told our straight outta the Fiftes, crew-cut sporting, no-nonsense gym teacher that it was "a woman's thing" and he would immediately dismiss them.

10:30 AM  
Blogger Sisyphus said...

I don't get 9b.

11:33 AM  
Blogger Nihilist in Golf Pants said...

If she's saying what I think, then she's being really mean.

11:53 AM  
Blogger wintryminx said...

The rise is the amount of fabric between the crotch and the button. That didn't mean what you thought it meant.

1:37 PM  

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