Top 11 Things City Pages Bloggers Are Likely To Claim To Overhear At A Republican Election Night Party

Saint Paul at Fraters Libertas notes that some of things “overheard” by City Pages bloggers at the Republican election night party last November 7 seem to coincide quite conveniently with liberal stereotypes of Republicans. Here are the top 11 things that City Pages bloggers are likely to “overhear” at a Republican election night party:

11. “Does anyone know where Wal-Mart keeps their confederate flags?”

10. “If we lose anymore seats in Congress we may have difficulty establishing our religious theocracy.”

9. “The real reason I don’t read City Pages is that I don’t know how to read.”

8. “I’m so upset about the election results that tomorrow I’m going to lay off my poorest employees and then beat my wife.”

7. “I’m glad the Democrats are kicking our ass; we are evil, after all.”

6. “How am I doing? Uh, I don’t know. How does Rush say I’m doing?”

5. “Whenever I say the word ‘the’ you should take that as code for ‘I hate all women, minorities, and gays’. The the the the the.”

4. “Look at this shiny bottle cap I got when I rolled a homeless guy on the way over!”

3. “I’m embarrassed that Lincoln was a Republican.”

2. “Just between you and me, I secretly listen to Al Franken and laugh my ass off at his barbed wit.”

1. “What a coincidence! My parents are brother and sister too!”