Monday, April 03, 2006


You may have noticed that there is a new member on the contributor list, and another Nihilist. The fellow referred to as the Nihilist in Assless Chaps (his name will soon change) is none other than the former Art Director of the Kool Aid Report (aka Notorious B.I.L., aka V-Toed Bill, aka Nihilist Wannabee).

In the absence of Sisyphus, Bill will be joining the team as Art VP. And big changes are in store. Those who have been with NIGP from the early days know that the graphics ban was Sisyphus' doing. It was grudgingly lifted, but soon you will see wonderful new graphics, courtesy of Bill. The new header to be unveiled is actually a tribute to Sisyphus, as it is an exact replication of the west wall of his bedroom. Imagine waking to the morning sun hitting these images (once we get them up). He once suggested that they are what gives his life meaning.

Since Bill has dealt a blow to the despotic, yet amusing Learned Foot (yes, I am saying you amuse me like some sort of clown) by leaving KAR to provide his talent to us, I am pleased to declare our war over and restore KAR to the top spot on the Nihilist's top 11 blogs. Also, I have cleared out the deadwood of two chick blogs that basically said sayonara to posting. They will be replaced with SCSU Scholars, which has really improved its quality in the past week or so and Planet Socks, a web site dedicated to mocking reality TV, especially "The Real World". What is it about the ladies of the MOB that makes so many of them give up on their blogs? The only worse group for quitting would be funny page cartoonists. Bloom County, Calvin & Hobbs, and The Far Side all quit way before their time, yet we can't get rid of Doonesbury. But I digress.

Despite these changes, we will still bring the best in popular culture commentary, song parodies, and of course top 11 lists. In fact, here is one inspired by the title of this post:

Top 11 Rock Tunes Featuring Drugged Up Stuttering Vocals
11. Changes - David Bowie

10. You Ain't Seen Nothin' Yet - Bachman Turner Overdrive

9. Birthday - The Beatles

8. Barbara Ann - The Beach Boys

7. My Sharona - The Knack

6. Bennie And The Jets - Elton John

5. Jimmy Jazz - The Clash

4. Bad To The Bone - George Thorogood

3. Back In The USSR - The Beatles

2. Psycho Killer - The Talking Heads

1. My Generation - The Who


Blogger Nicko McDave said...

The best thing about this list? No "Jive Talking" by the Bee Gees. Casey Kasem on American Top 40 once gave out some trivia about BTO having the top stuttering song of all time. A week later, Casey corrected himself after a listener wrote in to tell him that the Bee Gees had a bigger stuttering hit. A week after that, he corrected himself on the air after another listener said that, no, the Bee Gees weren't stuttering, they were speaking in a more or less complete sentence.

Thank you for being smarter than Casey Kasem. You're a credit to nihilism.

12:23 PM  
Anonymous KBK said...

With a Little Help From My Friends
--Joe Cocker

I Want to Play House with You

Baby, Baby, bu bu Baby
Baby Baby bu bu bu bu bu

6:27 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

The Bachman's had a brother who stuttered without drugs. (You ain't seen nothing yet) Their producer suggested they sing like he would. No drugs involved. You shouldn't assume drugs are involved. These are songs. People repeat stuff without drug involvement.

6:48 PM  
Anonymous Biggus Dickus said...

Psycho Killer does not belong on the list. You may have heard the lyrics as:


But they are actually:


A delicate interplay, you see, between 2 distinct syllables, FA and FAA, and not the stuttering consonant F of the syllabic FA.

8:49 PM  
Blogger OXEN said...

I see someone already mentioned Joe Cocker, but where's Janis Joplin on the list?

6:30 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Have them try to say "Hugh Hewitt" five times.

8:32 AM  

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