Friday, December 30, 2005

Top 11 Phony Reasons Given to the StarTribune for Canceling My Subscription

I finally cancelled my Star Tribune subscription last week. When they asked me why, I told them, but then regretted it. Why should I help those who hold me in such contempt? If I had to do it all over again, here are the top 11 fake reasons I would give for canceling my subscription:

11. You haven’t won a Pulitzer this millennium.

10. The Isaac Asimov super quiz is too hard.

9. Nick Coleman’s column does not run seven days a week.

8. As a boss, I’m offended by the “Dilbert” cartoon.

7. The guy who does the Saturday blog review article quotes the Flavor Aid Report too much.

6. Paul Douglas is clearly wearing a toupee in his weather page photo.

5. Need more award winning non-partisan commentary by Jim Boyd.

4. Not enough Paris Hilton stories.

3. I’m not insulted enough on the sports pages.

2. You’re completely ignoring “Brokeback Mountain”.

1. Too much dwelling on Minneapolis’ rising crime rate.

4 Comments:

Blogger Unknown said...

12) You don't quote Bob Moffitt from the ALAMN enough!

9:14 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

The drop-off in Paul Majors' career coverage was the last straw for me. Where's CJ when I need her?

2:42 PM  
Blogger Rambix said...

The new design is too classy for us knuckle-dragging conservatives.

10:45 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Congrats on the move away from the Dark Side. I did the same this summer and don't regret it for a minute. For a couple years, we only got it because the price was worth the ads and coupons, but on principle, I could just give no more money to this DFL socialist organization.

Guy

11:04 AM  

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