Top 11 Ways Wendy Davis Should Have "Tightened Up" Her Language

11. Technically speaking, there is no explicit Constitutional right to taxpayer funded birth control for married women having affairs

10. When she said her opponent hasn’t walked a mile in her shoes she should have said that her opponent hasn’t rolled a mile in her shoes

9. Shouldn't have called Michael Crabtree a sorry receiver

8. Could have better clarified her absolute hatred of men, children, and motherhood

7. Nicknaming her husband "the clueless ATM" might have been misinterpreted

6. In wedding vows, mistakenly said "til death do us part," when she meant to say "til my student loans are paid off do us part"

5. Private comments were misinterpreted, but she really thought her opponent was a member of a notorious LA street gang

4. Multiple misquotes of Indigo Girls lyrics during her abortion bill filibuster

3. Misquoted Henny Youngman; his joke wasn't "take my children, please;" also, her custody hearing probably wasn't the best place for that sort of joke

2. Incorrectly asserted that Helen Reddy song was titled, "I am woman, pay for my college"

1. Should have used the words "baby" or "human being" instead of "fetus" or "tissue"