The Top 11 Reasons For The Riots in Paris

11. It has been a long humorless ten years since Jerry Lewis has come out with a new movie.

10. No blood for soap

9. Being And Nothingness on backorder at local bookstores.

8. The new Hybrid LeCar has been slow to market.

7. Just learned of Tawanna Brawley's "rape."

6. They want a piece of Chirac's oil for food kickbacks.

5. Lance Armstrong keeps winning the championship of their national sport, despite the fact that no one in America cares about bike racing.

4. Euro Disney stopped selling fried brie curds.

3. Arby's new French Dip Sandwich sucks.

2. George W. Bush

1. Who cares? Muslims and French killing each other? It hasn't been this good since Iran Vs Iraq.