Thursday, March 31, 2005

NIHILIST IN GOLF PANTS EXCLUSIVE – NEWLY UNCOVERED DEMOCRATIC TALKING POINTS MEMO DISCUSSES HOW TO BENEFIT POLITICALLY FROM THE MICHAEL JACKSON TRIAL!

NOTE: We are not claiming that we know this memo was written by Democrats, only that Democrats can read it if they visit this website.

From the desk of House Minority Leader Henry Reed (DEMOCRAT – Neb.)

Talking Points on S.530 The Perverted Pop Star Protection Act

* Michael Jackson is a pop star currently standing trial on child molestation charges.
* The Senate needs to act this week before the Budget Act is pending business, or Mr. Jackson’s case may go to the jury.
* This is an important musical issue and our pop music base will be excited that the Senate is debating this important issue.
* This is a great political issue, because Senator Mark Kennedy of Minnesota has already refused to become a cosponsor and this is a tough issue for Republicans.
* This bill is very limited in scope and applies only to alleged child molesters who are pop stars.
* Pop stars are defined as those “presently capable of selling one million records or have previously sold more than twenty million records.”
* This legislation ensures that perverted pop stars like Michael Jackson are guaranteed the same legal acquittals as celebrity wife murderers like O. J. Simpson and Robert Blake.

2 Comments:

Blogger rew said...

This is a total crock.

Everyone knows the Minority Leader is a Henry Read from Oregon.

1:13 PM  
Blogger LearnedFoot said...

*Sigh*

Those of us that get it think this is a classic post.




-CJ. Warren Burger, writing for the dissent.

1:27 PM  

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