Wednesday, June 01, 2011

Top 11 New Marketing Slogans & Promotions For The Minnesota Twins

11. Bullpen Lighter Fluid Night

10. Family day: Atomizer's mouth will be duct taped for the game to prevent him from uttering a constant stream of profanities that may upset small children

9. Sit In The Trever Plouffe Errant Throw Zone: Two or three fans a game guaranteed to get balls

8. Disability Day: First 5000 Fans Receive Copy of Disabled List Autographed by Joe Mauer (reoccurring promotion)

7a. Delmon Leftfield Lawn Chair Day: includes a bell to summon the centerfielder

7. Two-for-one on beer every time Jim Hoey enters the game

6. See the mediocre players of tomorrow today!

5. Nightly Eighth Inning Fireworks display

4. Hot dog prices based down to Drew Butera's batting average

3. Mendoza Line Day: Tickets discounted by $1 for every player in the starting lineup hitting below the Mendoza line

2. On deck day: one lucky fan will bat second in the Twins lineup

1. Get to Loathe 'Em